We often point our fingers at other people, complaining that they don't respect us, or respect our feelings. There is often a reason for this! Life is a mirror and if you are being disrespected by others, the chances are you are disrespecting yourself!
Let's face it, if you don't respect yourself, why should anyone else?
If you find yourself surrounded by others who walk all over you, make decisions for you or generally treat you like a second class citizen, then it is important to get honest with yourself and look at how you are doing this to YOURSELF.
Do you fail to speak up for yourself allowing others to bully you? If so, you are not respecting your feelings and emotions.
Do you allow people to make decisions on your life or decide what is good / not good for you? If so, you are disrespecting your own right to make your own decisions and future.
A key thing in respecting yourself is remembering that your needs are just as important as other people. You have a right to be heard and take your own feelings and emotions seriously. Do not walk all over yourself as others will walk over you.
Other common ways we can disrespect ourselves include:
1) Not looking after our bodies
2) Always putting other people’s needs before yours
3) Allowing other people to push you around
4) Being too busy to take care of your own needs
5) Not speaking up for yourself.
Remember, if you think other people’s time, feelings, space or emotions are more important than your own, then you are not respecting yourself.
Time to Take Action.
Learning to respect yourself may take some time, but it will reap huge rewards. You really owe to yourself.
Here are a few of my favourite tips to start you moving into Self Respect:
Affirm - I love and respect myself.
Take a small risk every day. Challenge someone’s opinion or make your opinion known.
Don't swallow your feelings, try telling someone how you really feel, instead of agreeing with their opinion.
Take time to rest your body and relax.
Ask yourself daily ' How do I feel right now?' This will get you used to recognising what your emotions are trying to tell you.
Most of all, don't fear feeling uncomfortable. We can often feel scared or uncomfortable speaking up for ourselves or making our feelings known, this is part of the process and it just means you are changing old negative patterns. Stick with it and your life will change.
Lisa Phillips